The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Morning

"In the bus on the way to school next morning we passed 4 red cars in a row, which meant that it was a Good Day ... 4 yellow cars in a row made it a Black Day, which is a day I don't speak to anyone and sit on my own reading books and don't eat my lunch and Take No Risks." (Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, Haddon, Mark, pg.24)

Cheyenne and I left early. It was still dark, the air cool and humid. Moisture condensed on my clothes and I was damp before I ever made the first cross street. It was a strange morning. I heard rustling in the bushes, and twigs snapping. Cheyenne and I both heard snorts and snuffles as we passed the woods. Usually in the morning we hear the insects singing-and that's it. So all this pre-dawn activity was disconcerting. Most mornings the joggers, runners, and dog-walkers say hello or nod as they pass. Today at the first Brown Light District (where development streets intersect with Jaycox) I said "Good morning" to two different people. They were hanging out just waiting for their dog to finish. Neither one replied! I was beginning to think this was going to be a bad day. We proceeded to the next corner. Surely someone in the next Brown Light District will say hello.
The rest of the walk was uneventful- I had shaken that ominous feeling and maybe today would be a good day after all. Our house was in sight, we almost made it when Cheyenne strained at her leash, pushed her head under a bush and started snorting furiously. She spread all fours and braced herself and started howling! Cheyenne had disturbed a baby skunk and he was high-tailing it across the yard!- Luckily for us-not too high because we escaped unscented.

So, how many weird things have to happen before I can call it a Black Day and sit home and read?

Sweet Grass Cafe


The past few mornings Cheyenne and I have walked south on Jaycox to Hickory Lane. It has become obvious that Cheyenne has three favorite spots - The Jungle (the wooded empty lot on the east side of the street), Troll Bridge (so named for the troll that must live under it because Cheyenne insists on stopping every time, pokes her head through the rails and leans over so far that one of these times I think she'll fall through) and the Sweet Grass Cafe (a yard that is edged with a split-rail fence and juicy tall grass). This morning was rush hour at Sweet Grass Cafe. Cheyenne stopped for her usual morning munch and had been chomping away for several minutes when I turned and noticed there was a line behind us! A man and his dog, a big Golden Retriever, were waiting. Behind him, across the corner was a lady with a wiry black-haired mutt). I think Cheyenne and I were holding up the line. It reminded me of Monday mornings at Starbucks. I wonder if they have take-out?


Now to get caught up on my virtual walk- I made it to Old Woman's Creek on Mon. for a total of 28.7 miles. Old Woman's Creek is lovely, they have several pairs of bald eagles. You can always see a Blue Heron or two. My next stop is Cedar Point, Sandusky(9.8 miles) . After that I will be visiting the Marblehead Lighthouse (9.1 mi.), and then my birth place, Port Clinton (14.3 mi.).

Denizens of the Dusk and Dawn

Today marks the beginning of another school year. Cheyenne and I have to do something I avoid at all costs: change. Instead of our leisurely three and a half mile walk with a cup of coffee in the middle, we went early this morning. It was still dark with just a hint of light in the sky. The night scents were still lingering on trash and treelawns. I planned to walk two miles, to the end of the street and back, but Cheyenne had to sniff and snort at every treelawn. Today is garbage pick-up so the treelawns were decorated with all sorts of goodies: open bags of trash, old furniture, piles of wood, and bags of yard debris. The denizens of the dawn had left their scent and Cheyenne spent the walk nose to the ground sniffing raccoon, skunk, and deer. She had a great time! I'm sure she walked twice as far as I did!

Our treelawn was particularly bountiful. Yesterday we emptied out the space above the garage. We pitched out the original doors, windows, and screens from our house, neon orange draperies that only Austin Powers could love, bicycle rims, a steel snow plow, and a rusted bed frame. We left the asbestos ceiling tiles for hazardous waste day. It was dusk by the time we got everything placed to the street. Down the street, passing slowly by, came the trash hauler, his pick-up heavily loaded and listing precariously to the right. He examined our trash. I was grateful that SOMEONE actually thought our trash (I should say Syd and Grace's trash) was worth taking a second look. He stopped, picked through it and took all our "heavy metal". I was relieved. Someone, somewhere might get some use out of it.

FF or ADD?

After many years (make that decades) of convincing my taste buds that fat-free foods really are scrumptious, it's taken Cheyenne exactly 35 min. to make me doubt myself. Being the health conscious person I am, I bought Cheyenne fat-free turkey dogs for her training treat. She sat eagerly for the first treat, but after that, she was like a kid with ADD. She wouldn't sit, wouldn't stay, looked up and down the street, licked her tail, and tried to eat the weeds at the curb. When I pushed her butt down to make her sit- she gave me ATTITUDE! I could read her doggie mind, "I'm only doing this because you make me. I have better things to do than perform for fat- free turkey dogs. Talk to this..." , and she'd stand up.

This got me to thinking. Dogs are often wiser than people. They know when there's an earthquake coming, they know when their owner is coming home before they get there, (I've only heard about this- my personal experience is that when I come home I wake her up. I've seen her stretch as she comes out of the bedroom), and they can usually tell nice people from not nice people, demonstrated by the tail-wag or tail-tuck. She just might have a point here. Makes me want to toss that fat-free frozen sushi sorbet down the drain and buy some Breyer's-Clog-Your-Arteries-Chocolate Chip Mint-mmmmm, I can taste it now. But really, statistically one trial is not enough. Just to be on the cautious side I 'll wait and see how we do on our next walk. Maybe fat-free turkey dogs are an acquired taste. Hmmm- I wonder how she'll like Morningstar veggie dogs?

How I Flunked Out of Dog Obedience School

Cheyenne was an original pound puppy. We got her when she was six months old and she had developed a few bad habits. So we signed her up for Dog Obedience School. What I didn't know was that the teacher used a combination of pain, embarrassment, and public humiliation to get her point across, for the owners, that is, not the dogs. There were about thirty suckers (whoops) people enrolled with their dogs. We met in a warehouse. Class consisted of making two circles and then walking our dogs around in a circle so they could exhibit whatever skill it was they were supposed to have learned.

I've always thought of our dogs as family members. I talked to them as if they were my children.They were encouraged to sleep on the couch (with me), I indulged them with a lot of bones and treats, and always told them where I was going and when I'd be back. I did draw the line at feeding them at the table. We always put their plate on the floor. So it went against my grain as a mother, teacher, and just plain nice human being to embarrass my children in public. I always dragged them aside somewhere -usually the cookie aisle in the grocery store, and gently whispered in their ear, "If you don't quit asking for stuff - I'm going to smack you."
You can see the problem.
It was the third class and Cheyenne still wasn't behaving properly. She wasn't "walking", "sitting", or "staying" like she should have been. So I stooped over, picked up one floppy ear and started whispering to her what I needed her to do. At this the instructor screamed all the way across the room, "You are ruining that dog!" She proceeded to point out everything I was doing wrong. I was the class' "bad example".
After that, I showed up dogless. I sat on the side and watched the parade. I'd paid my money, I had a right to be there. After I withdrew from the circle she found a new "bad example".
Cheyenne and I graduated in absentia with a doggie diploma and a certificate of attendance.

My Marriage in Dog Years

Today is our 35th anniversary. I can't believe Chuck has put up with me for 35 years, through thick and thin (more thick than thin). I want to take this opportunity to see our marriage in dog years- how the dogs we've had enriched our marriage and brought us closer together. They've brought out some of our finest qualities.
Determination:
"Damn it! I was here first. I can outlast this dog."

Compassion:
"I'll take her to the vet in the morning. I'm sure they must have something to
de-skunk her."

Perseverance:
"If you bring another animal into this house-I'm leaving!"

Love:
"We don't need to put her to sleep yet. I'll carry her up and down the back stairs when she needs to go out."


Our first dog, Max, was a mutt purchased from Pampered Pets in Kodiak, AK. We had been married only a month and living in a WWII quonset hut with a fuel oil heater. She was a surprise for Chuck. He had always had a dog at home and I was never allowed to have one. So I bought one for him. Or was it for me? When he came home from work the puppy was sitting on one side of the room and I was sitting on the other side- crying.
"I bought you a dog- but I'm afraid you're going to love the dog more than me!" I wailed.
I don't remember what he said- but I know it was perfect and kind and loving, because we became a happy family of three. Max was a wonder dog. She was never on a leash, came when we called, and was an expert at dumpster-diving. When Max died, we shared the pain, leaned on each other, cried, and got through it- together.
Maggie, the next dog, we picked out together. There were several black puppies and this one particularly licked Chuck (yes, licked) . She was rambunctious from the word go and stayed that way. The only problem was- she didn't like kids. She was very protective of me. She would growl at Chuck. This is the same dog that Chuck carried up and down the stairs at the end- because I couldn't part with her.
And now, Cheyenne. Cheyenne and I got off to a rocky start. First of all. she was picked out by Erin. So she's Erin's dog. I didn't feel I could spoil her- because she wasn't my dog. Cheyenne was definitely "pack- leader". I didn't know that a human was supposed to be pack- leader, so I just kept calling her "Bad Dog" and saying, "No bite", "Don't jump", "No pull" and finally, "Damn dog". But I think the three of us have made our peace. She goes for rides with Chuck in the truck. It's his legs she hides under when it thunders. She walks with me and I kindly remove the fork from the plate before I put it on the floor. She still eats the cat food- while it's in the can and she still eats grass and throws up in our bed. But we're all learning- together.

Determination, compassion, perseverance , and love.
And the greatest of these is love.

Meating at the Corner


I want to thank Becket, Megan, and Keith for teaching me this little trick. If you give a dog a piece of meat he will follow you anywhere. After watching Keith and Megan train Becket using pieces of hot dog I realized that Cheyenne and I could benefit from this. After several shoulder-numbing trips to Arabica I decided to try this on Cheyenne. I want her to sit at corners and wait for my signal and I want her to quit jumping on everybody who passes by. (I've seen other dogs do this, so I know I'm not asking the impossible.)
Last week a miracle occurred. Cheyenne sat at the corners and waited for her treat! It even worked for those pesky joggers and bikers. (Although they tend to prefer low-fat turkey dogs.) We had only one minor problem. That sneaky Cheyenne! While I'm busy watching traffic, waiting for a safe opportunity to cross, she stands up and tries to steal the hot dog out of my hand! Obviously, her opinion of my intelligence is not too high. However, I'm happy. We fooled several people into thinking Cheyenne was a well-trained dog, a dog with credentials and a D.O. degree. (Dog Obedience).
Speaking of dog obedience- be sure to watch for the future blog when I tell all - "How I Flunked Out of Dog Obedience School After Only Three Lessons".

As for the virtual walk- Cheyenne and I only did a mile today. We went to French Creek and walked the Big Woods Trail. We even creek-walked a little. Then she ran through the mud before she got in the car. I should have taken the truck.

Poseidon in Bed

Tee-hee-hee- made you look! Actually this is in reference to Cheyenne's tip from yesterday. When we went to bed last night we pulled back the covers and found -GASP- a mass of seaweed - fresh from the deep! Deep, doggie tummy, that is. Cheyenne, exhausted from the walk, went to bed and was obviously too tired to move. Yuch!! I'll say no more and spare you the slimy details.
Today, I virtually made it to Vermillion, home of the Wooly Bear Festival. It's 13.1 miles west of Lorain so I've walked or ridden my bike for a total walk of 21.6 miles.
If I was really there I'd be doing some antique shopping and stopping for ice cream. It's a quaint little town with a seafaring atmosphere- lakefaring, I mean. Did I mention, I'm an avid birder? Next stop, Old Woman's Creek in Huron-home of several pairs of bald eagles.

Cheyenne wants to know: "Hey,when Helen takes me for a walk - I'm a magnet. I mean, EVERYONE stops to talk to me. How come when I'm good- "sitting and staying" they say, 'What a nice dog!' But, when I'm 'bad'-jumping all over showing them how excited I am - they say, 'What a cute doggie!' Hmmm- would I rather be cute or nice?

Decisions, decisions, decisions...

The goal of this blog is honesty and commitment. Some of the hats I wear are teacher, wife, empty-nester, journalist/artist, animal lover, Shakespeare afficionado, avid reader, and last, but not least, tree-hugger. At 57 I am looking eternity in the eye and taking count of all the things I've accomplished and the long list of things I've wanted to do , but haven't gotten to yet. Even though I am in good health, every once in a while I hear a voice whisper-"Hurry up, there's only so much time left." The problem is I'm a great procrastinator. I spend a lot of time in my head, (that' s a scary place!) and hardly any time DOING what I think about. I always have great plans, but don't follow through. So in an attempt to solve this little quirk- I'm going public. Thus the blog.
Chuck and I went to Europe this summer and spent time in Germany, Austria, and Italy. I found out that I can walk forever, just not very fast. So when I came home I decided that Cheyenne (picture forthcoming) and I would walk to Arabica - about 2 miles. I'd have a Mocha Java and she'd have a Barka Lotta and then we'd walk home. Here comes the commitment part. I have decided to do a virtual Walk Across America. I put up a map of the US and track the distance from city to city. When I make it to the next city I put myself in a picture and stick it on the map.(pictures forthcoming). So far Cheyenne and I have made our first goal, Lorain, OH. So we've gone 8.5 miles this week, starting in beautiful Avon-on-the Lake (aka. Avon Lake/Center of the Universe).From time to time you'll hear about books I'm reading, lessons I've learned from Cheyenne, and hopefully you'll see what better shape I'm in!
Cheyenne's first lesson: Take time to stop and eat the grass.